


That One Time They Had A Group Chat

by Oliver_Is_Tired



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Ghost Wilbur Soot, M/M, Multi, Nonbinary Character, Sex Jokes, Transgender Characters, groupchats
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:34:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27927580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oliver_Is_Tired/pseuds/Oliver_Is_Tired
Summary: Everyone Is Trans. Besides Mega, Purpled, AntFrost , and Karl. They are nonbinary (ayeee like me) Everyone goes by he/him unless mentionedTubbo: He/TheyEret: Any pronounsBBH: He/TheyMega: They/ThemPurpled: It/Its(LIKE ME :D)AntFrost: He/ItKarl: They/ThemNone of these are confirmed besides Erets
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity/Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Antfrost/VelvetIsCake (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound, Eret & Floris | Fundy, George | Spifey/TapL/JustVurb, Jacob | Zelk/MegaPVP (Video Blogging RPF), Jschlatt/Wilbur Soot, Karl Jacobs/Sapnap, Ponk | DropsByPonk/Sam | Awesamdude, Ranboo & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Zak Ahmed/Darryl Noveschosch
Comments: 51
Kudos: 334





	1. Chapter 1

Group chat names:  
Gogy- ColorBlindBitch  
Dream- StepDream  
Sapnap- SamsungSmartFridge  
Skeppy- SkepBro  
BBH- Mom  
MegaPvP- GETTHEMABLESYRUP  
Zelk- PackItUpFundyKinnie  
Spifey- NoBrainCells  
Vurb- OkayYaoiBoy  
Tommy- ThatsAChild  
Tubbo- DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO  
Wilbur- Ghostbur:p Jschlatt- StfuYouBottom

Philza- MinecraftDaddy (I DO NOT MEAN THIS IN A SEXUAL WAY)  
Technoblade- OrphanMurderer  
Quackity- FlattyPatty  
TapL- BisexualBoi (he actually is bi :p)

TimeDeo- DamnOkaySantaStannie  
Ranboo- TimeMan  
Purpled- Pretty-Nonbinary AntFrost- heheherawr VelvetIsRed- AntsBoyfriend

Ponk- Idk  
Fundy- IMNOTAFURRY  
Eret- FLAMINGOS  
Punz- CorpseButBlonde (this is an inside joke)  
ConnorEatsPants- ...  
Karl- SapnapsHusband

SamsungSmartFridge: Hey Guys today we coded it so that Quackity isn’t such a HOE

FlattyPatty: bitch I swear to fucking GOD I AM NOT A HOE

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: What's a hoe?

ThatsAChild: You

MinecraftDaddy: Don’t call your brother a hoe

ThatsAChild: THEY ARE A HOE

Mom: Language 

OkayYaoiBoy: Wanna see a hoe? Look at Spifey

NoBrainCells: I will divorce you right here 

BisexualBoi: we’re married¿

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: :D Me and Spifey are hoes!

AntsBoyfriend: I know this child did not just call himself a hoe-

SamsungSmartFridge: TUBBO YOU'RE NOT A HOE. NEITHER IS SPIFEY. QUACKITY- HE IS 100%

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: aww :( but I wanna be a hoe like Quackity

Pretty-Nonbinary: Tubbo do you know what a hoe is?

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: Tommy said I was a hoe and Vurb said Spifey was one so.....Idk I would say an asexual but Spifey isn't asexual at least I don’t think he is

BisexualBoi: oh! Yeah Spifey definitely isn’t asexual:p

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: Then I have no clue what a hoe is

MinecraftDaddy: I- oh my- child- 

Ghostbur:p: whats going on? 

MinecraftDaddy: Tubbo learned a new word cause of Sapnap.

Ghostbur:p: :0 whats the new word? I love learning new things!

AntsBoyfriend: hoe

Ghostbur:p: whats that mean¿

downtotheatchiveswego: SEE I WAS WONDERING THE SAME THING- 

Mom: I cannot with you muffin heads 

ThatsAChild: BITCH

Mom: AHHHH

ThatsAChild: FUCK 

Mom: TOMMY NO-

ThatsAChild: COCK

-ThatsAChild was kicked by SkepBro-

SkepBro: I’ll add him back when he can learn to control himself

Mom: Thank you Skeppy :)

SkepBro: no problem 

Ghostbur:p: Tommy just texted me telling me to tell Bad that he is a cock sucking bitch. What does that mean?

MinecraftDaddy: DEAR LORD-

(Next chapter will be longer and more ppl will speak- but I’m tired and I’ve been meaning to get this out for about a week- y a w n. Yay I’m finally posting shit-


	2. Chapter 2

Group chat names:  
Gogy- ColorBlindBitch  
Dream- StepDream  
Sapnap- SamsungSmartFridge  
Skeppy- SkepBro  
BBH- Mom  
MegaPvP- GETTHEMABLESYRUP  
Zelk- PackItUpFundyKinnie  
Spifey- NoBrainCells  
Vurb- OkayYaoiBoy  
Tommy- ThatsAChild  
Tubbo- DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO  
Wilbur- Ghostbur:p Jschlatt- StfuYouBottom

Philza- MinecraftDaddy (I DO NOT MEAN THIS IN A SEXUAL WAY)  
Technoblade- OrphanMurderer  
Quackity- FlattyPatty  
TapL- BisexualBoi (he actually is bi :p)

TimeDeo- DamnOkaySantaStannie  
Ranboo- TimeMan  
Purpled- Pretty-Nonbinary AntFrost- heheherawr VelvetIsRed- AntsBoyfriend

Ponk- Idk  
Fundy- IMNOTAFURRY  
Eret- FLAMINGOS  
Punz- CorpseButBlonde (this is an inside joke)  
ConnorEatsPants- ...  
Karl- SapnapsHusband

heheherawr: I apologize for bothering anyone but, Ranboo just broke into my house and stole my boyfriend 

StepDream: I’m sorry- w h a t-?

heheherawr: Ranboo, you know the one with white and black hair the green and red eyes. Him yeah he broke into my house and took Velvet 

AntsBoyfriend: Im all good just uh- being taken hostage by a child and idiot and Ranboo

OrphanMurderer: Is my hoe bothering someone?

Mom: Language.

FlattyPatty: No baby I’m not doing anything:)

AntsBoyfriend: Someone please help me- The British child and the flat ass one is harassing me

OrphanMurderer: I’m on my way to collect my hoe- 

Mom: Language ,Technoblade.

OrphanMurderer: Sorry

MinecraftDaddy: Wheres my sons? 

AntsBoyfriend: The British one is harassing me, the potato farmer is on his way to get his boyfriend, the dead one is playing Smash Bros with Schlatt in the other room, and the adopted one is- Im not sure what he’s doing actually- 

MinecraftDaddy: Alright the normal for them 

OrphanMurderer: Quackity where are you? 

FlattyPatty: Not in Wilburs house 

ThatsAChild: BLOODY FUCKING HELL QUACKITY 

OrphanMurderer: Alright I’m coming 

SkepBro: Thats what she said 

Mom: Skeppy! >:/ 

SkepBro: :> I love you 

Mom: Whatever I love you too 

SamsungSmartFridge: God you two are so gay 

SapnapsHusband: I know you aren’t talking- I’ll leak our 12:36am messages 

SamsungSmartFridge: NOT THE SEXTING AT 12 AM

OrphanMurderer: THE FUCKING WHAT-?

FLAMINGOS: DID I READ THAT CORRECTLY?

BisexualBoi: No- I don’t wanna know about what you two do or say

PackItUpFundyKinnie: nO❤️ 

Mom: Please disregard anything sexual from this group chat please and thank you :)

SkepBro: so you don’t wanna talk about what we do every Friday night? 

Mom: NO 

OkayYaoiBoy: Wait- I wanna know- tell me

SkepBro: Bad likes ✨maid dresses✨

Mom: NO SHUT UP NO NO NO NO 

StepDream: Oh my- 

Ghostbur:p: Maid dresses are pretty they look really pretty on Schlatt 

ColorBlindBitch: Damn didn’t know you two screwed. Can ghost even have sex?

Ghostbur:p: Sex? Goodness no! We don’t do that he wears them too clean. And yes ghost can have sex we just don’t want to at the moment we only just started dating 

Mom: Language. 

SamsungSmartFridge: Wait so you two can fuck? 

Ghostbur:p: Yep! But we’re saving it for marriage 

StfuYouBottom: we are? The i’ll just go ahead and buy you a ring oh wait I already have one :p 

Mom: :0 

SamsungSmartFridge: Are they about to be engaged??? 

StepDream: holy shit- Wilbur? 

ColorBlindBitch: Ghostbur? 

ThatsAChild: AYYYY MY BROTHER IS GONNA GET MARRIED FUCK YEAHHHH 

FlattyPatty: when are we getting married Techno? 

OrphanMurderer: Bitch we’re already married 

Mom: Language, Technoblade. 

OrphanMurderer: Apologies 

StfuYouBottom: We’re engaged now :p 

Mom: YAY!!!! GEPPY THEY GOT MARRIED! 

SkepBro: CONGRATS? 

SapnapsHusband: CONGRATULATIONS GHOSTBUR! 

SamsungSmartFridge: MORE GAY MARRIAGE? 

Ghostbur:p: YEAH! 

ColorBlindBitch: WOOOO 

FLAMINGOS: Congratulations Ghostbur and Ghost Schlatt who is taking who’s last name? 

StfuYouBottom: I’m going to be Schlatt Soot 

heherawr: I still never got my boyfriend 

TimeMan: we still have him 

ThatsAChild: WE HAVE THE AMERICAN BITCH YEAHHH BITCH 

TimeMan: He just jumped out the window. I didn’t really care enough to stop him 

AntsBoyfriend: FREE AT LAST 

MinecraftDaddy: WHO THE FUCK BROKE MY WINDOW?! 

Mom: LANGUAGE

(I apologize for chapter two taking SO fucking long- I’m not christian myself (I’m an atheist) but my family is so I’ve been celebrating Christmas and shit and then theres s c h o o l-


	3. Chapter 3

Group chat names:  
Gogy- ColorBlindBitch  
Dream- StepDream  
Sapnap- SamsungSmartFridge  
Skeppy- SkepBro  
BBH- Mom  
MegaPvP- GETTHEMABLESYRUP  
Zelk- PackItUpFundyKinnie  
Spifey- NoBrainCells  
Vurb- OkayYaoiBoy  
Tommy- ThatsAChild  
Tubbo- DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO  
Wilbur- Ghostbur:p Jschlatt- StfuYouBottom

Philza- MinecraftDaddy (I DO NOT MEAN THIS IN A SEXUAL WAY)  
Technoblade- OrphanMurderer  
Quackity- FlattyPatty  
TapL- BisexualBoi (he actually is bi :p)

TimeDeo- DamnOkaySantaStannie  
Ranboo- TimeMan  
Purpled- Pretty-Nonbinary AntFrost- heheherawr VelvetIsRed- AntsBoyfriend

Ponk- Idk  
Fundy- IMNOTAFURRY  
Eret- FLAMINGOS  
Punz- CorpseButBlonde (this is an inside joke)  
ConnorEatsPants- ...  
Karl- SapnapsHusband

CorpseButBlonde: someones fucking in my house.

NoBrainCells: that would be Quackity and Techno-

CorpseButBlonde: w h y

...: Quackity told us in the Bottom Bitches group chat

GETTHEMABLESYRUP: the bottoms have a group chat-? 

PackItUpFundyKinnie: yes Mega. Yes we do.

SamsungSmartFridge: who alls in it?

NoBrainCells: me, Tapl, connor, Quackity, Karl, George, Fundy, Skeppy, Ant, Zelk and Ponk

SamsungSmartFridge: Skeppys a bottom 🧍🏻?

Mom: yeah

ThatsAChild: oh my god guys stop talking about seggs🧍🏼 I’m a minor! You’re sexualizing me 😩

GETTHEMABLESYRUP: Child shut up- 

ThatsAChild: b͎̣̫͈̥̗͒͌̃͑̔̾ͅi̞̟̫̺ͭ̒ͭͣt̘̟̼̉̈́͐͋͌̊c͔ͣͦ́́͂ͅh͚̖̜̍̃͐ w̠̘̗͖̮̥ͣ̽ͫ͂h͚̖̜̍̃͐a̘̫͈̭͌͛͌̇̇̍t̘̟̼̉̈́͐͋͌̊

GETTHEMABLESYRUP: I said shut up. You six years old or something? 

[SkepBro sent a photo]  
(The photo is of Skeppy doing that one Shrek face- ya know like wheres hes smiling and in the swamp?)

BisexualBoi: PLEASE WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE THAT-

SkepBro: why do you wear a mask? Oh yeah- cause you ugly 🙄

NoBrainCells: OI- MF DO NOT CALL MY BOYFRIEND UGLY OR I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD WHEN YOU WAKE UP- YOULL BE IN HEAVEN BITCH I SWEAR.

SkepBro: Okay. Okay. Okay. I apologize- Sorry Spifey- 

OkayYaoiBoy: 🧍🏻 well then-

NoBrainCells: I’ll destroy you also- EW STOP JERKING OFF IN THE BATHROOM I CAN HEAR YOU-

OkayYaoiBoy: I’m not even in the bathroom I’m in the kitchen-

Mom: o_O

NoBrainCells: Tapl get out of the bathroom and stop jerking off-

BisexualBoi: let me finsh 

ThatsAChild: I’m- thats- you’re fucking disgusting 

SkepBro: dude- stop texting- 

MinecraftDaddy: What on Earth did I come back too?

ThatsAChild: DAD- THEY KEEP TALKING ABOUT SEX-

MinecraftDaddy: mhm thats nice son, Wheres Ghostbur, Tubbo, and Techno-?

Ghostbur:p: I’m right here! I’m sitting by a tree with Friend and Schlatt:)

MinecraftDaddy: Okay good to know, Tubbo and Technoblade?

CorpseButBlonde: Techno and Quackity are having sex in my house- wait no- OH MY GOD THEY ARE SCREWING ON MY ROOF-

MinecraftDaddy: awesome. The adopted one?

IMNOTAFURRY: they’re with me we’re having a movie night with Ant, Velvet, Skeppy, Bad, and Sykkuno 

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: Sykkunos super sweet we should add him! Hi Dad! 

MinecraftDaddy: Hello Tubbo :)

FLAMINGOS: Wait- we should add Sykkuno 

BisexualBoi: Whose Sykkuno-

IMNOTAFURRY: Ghostbur but 28 and dating a music artist 

BisexualBoi: OH WAIT- CORPSES BOYFRIEND? 

CorpseButBlonde: Yeah 

BisexualBoi: WAIT OH MY GOD SPIFEY LISTENS TO CORPSES MUSIC ALL THE TIME- ME AND VURB WILL BE DOWNSTAIRS WATCHING A MOVIE AND FROM OUR ROOM YOU’LL RANDOMLY HEAR “ Make a stack, PepeLaugh, got all of these bitches mad”

NoBrainCells: OKAY. I GET IT. I KNOW I LIKE CAT GIRLS ARE RUINING MY LIFE

Mom: I listen to Corpse often, White-Tee is my favourite:) 

ThatsAChild: you’re the last person I’d expect to say that-

Mom: Why? Its a good song

MinecraftDaddy: Who is Corpse?

DamnOkaySantaStannie: https://youtu.be/vrJJ42g2od0 here.

MinecraftDaddy: Okay

IMNOTAFURRY: You did not just send him that song

DamnOkaySantaKinnie: I did. And I’ll do it again BAP BAP BAP

SkepBro: Go home Deo- you’re high

DamnOkaySantaKinnie: for once I’m actually not- so F U C K O F F

Mom: LANGUAGE!

MinecraftDaddy: Tubbo. Tommy. Technoblade. Ghostbur. Fundy. You’re not allowed to listen to Corpse

DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO: hehe CHOKE ME LIKE YOU HATE ME LOWKEY WANNA DATE ME WHEN YOU FUCK ME go brrrrrr 

Ghostbur: haha dirty words go brr brr

MinecraftDaddy: I’m-

(Chapter three is done! :) should I add Sykkuno in?


	4. Chapter 4

Group chat names:  
Gogy- ColorBlindBitch  
Dream- StepDream  
Sapnap- SamsungSmartFridge  
Skeppy- SkepBro  
BBH- Mom  
MegaPvP- GETTHEMABLESYRUP  
Zelk- PackItUpFundyKinnie  
Spifey- NoBrainCells  
Vurb- OkayYaoiBoy  
Tommy- ThatsAChild  
Tubbo- DOWNTOTHEATCHIVESWEGO  
Wilbur- Ghostbur:p Jschlatt- StfuYouBottom

Philza- MinecraftDaddy (I DO NOT MEAN THIS IN A SEXUAL WAY)  
Technoblade- OrphanMurderer  
Quackity- FlattyPatty  
TapL- BisexualBoi (he actually is bi :p)

TimeDeo- DamnOkaySantaStannie  
Ranboo- TimeMan  
Purpled- Pretty-Nonbinary AntFrost- heheherawr VelvetIsRed- AntsBoyfriend

Ponk- Idk  
Fundy- IMNOTAFURRY  
Eret- FLAMINGOS  
Punz- CorpseButBlonde (this is an inside joke)  
ConnorEatsPants- ...  
Karl- SapnapsHusband

heherawr: Sams dying his hair again-

FLAMINGOS: When the fuck isn’t he dying his hair a new shade of green?

heherawr: Its purple...

FlattyPatty: ITS WHAT?

heherawr: Purple.

Idk: He’s my boyfriend how the hell did I not know about this tf?

Mom: Cause you’re not here with us

Idk: SO BAD AND ANT KNOW MORE THAN ME- WHAT THE HELL

AntsBoyfriend: I’m here too- 

SkepBro: Me three!

Idk: Im convinced he’s having an orgy with you all at this point

heherawr: what the actual fuck- Ant and Red are dating- Ants on the asexual spectrum (A/N: not confirmed) Bad and Skeppy are dating and Skeppy is too weird to have sex with anyone other than BBH- Sam

ColorBlindBitch: What did I just come back too?

StepDream: You came alright:)

SamsungSmartFridge: 🙂🤚🏼 Too much information for me

OkayYaoiBoy: Can I see a pic?

NoBrainCells: Im getting the spray bottle 

OkayYaoiBoy: WAIT NO IM SORRY I WAS JOKING- BABE YOU KNOW I WAS JOKING PLEASE

OkayYaoiBoy: Spifey?

BisexualBoi: You a dead bitch now

OkayYaoiBoy: Spifey where are you?

OkayYaoiBoy: SPIFEY PLEASE IM SCARED

GETTHEMABLESYRUP: He a dead bitch now

Mom: Language 

GETTHEMABLESYRUP: LaNgUaGe- shut the hell up smh

FlattyPatty: you dun fucked up now

Mom: IM GONNA KILL MEGA- IM GONNA DO IT- ZELK YOU BETTER GET YOUR BOYFRIEND BEFORE I KILL THEM

GETTHEMABLESYRUP: Come at me bitch-

BisexualBoi: I just heard the loudest fucking screech I have ever heard in my entire 19 years on this god for saken earth.

ColorBlindBitch: Hm?

OkayYaoiBoy: MF SPIFEY FUCKING SPRAYED ME WITH THE WATER BUT IT WAS FUCKING COLD OH MY GOD-

NoBrainCells: You got what you deserved. TapL you do anything stupid you will be next

ThatsAChild: Can someone tell Ranboo to stop blasting PATD?

MinecraftDaddy: IS THAT WHAT THIS BULLSHIT IS?

ThatsAChild: Yes. He has been listening to I Write Sins Not Tragedies on loop for the past four hours. I have not seen him leave his room.

TimeMan: And you won’t for another two hours

PrettyNonbinary: Edge lord looking ass

TimeMan: I know you aren’t talking. Want me to call up 80?

PrettyNonbinary: NO DO NOT CALL 80 PLEASE HE WILL END MY LIFE IF HE FINDS OUT IM BULLING YOU AGAIN- PLEASE DO NOT CALL YOUR BROTHER PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

ThatsAChild: Huh? Who’s 80? Ranboo you have a brother? The fuck?

TimeMan: GamerBoy80 is what he goes by but his name is 80 and yes I have a brother he’s older than me but yes

ThatsAChild: WE’VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 27 YEARS AND YOU JUST NOW TELL ME THIS?!

TimeMan: I’m 44? I thought I was 17 and we’re married???

MinecraftDaddy: Ranboo dont listen to him- you are 17 and no you two aren’t married- legally- it’s Platonically from what I’ve been told

-heherawr added CREEPERAWMAN-

CREEPERAWMAN: My hair is neon purple and I regret nothing at all 

SapnapsHusband: JESUS HONKING CHRIST TECHNOBLADE JUST JUMPED THROUGH MY WINDOW AND STOLE ONE OF MY BAKED POTATOES 

SamsungSmartFridge: What the actual fuck- 🧍🏻

OrphanMurderer: POTATOES FOR THE BLOOD GOD HELL YEAH!

SapnapsHusband: My window- ;—;

-TimeMan added HoeHoeHoe-

HoeHoeHoe: Purpled. 

PrettyNonbinary: hey y’all Im here with my best friend

HoeHoeHoe: I told you to stop bullying people. 

PrettyNonbinary: best friend show em your moves

HoeHoeHoe: You know what happens now?

PrettyNonbinary: ooh yuh get it I guess

HoeHoeHoe: Im not gonna visit you for a week now

PrettyNonbinary: Okay I’m next best friend- get the camera 

HoeHoeHoe: Im not bringing you one of my hoodies either. You’ve lost those privileges for a week

PrettyNonbinary: Dougie hype me up 😃

(I sincerely apologize on my behalf for this chapter- its so stupid 🗿)


End file.
